The Change by Milan Ross & Scott Stoll

Author:Milan Ross & Scott Stoll
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Square One Publishers

Milan reciting his poem “From a Keg to a Six-Pack” at the immersion talent show.

From a Keg to a Six-Pack

Once upon a time …. Well, back when I was thin

I did lots of cool stuff like shoot hoops and swim

I could eat whatever I wanted and never gain a pound

Stay up late and drink a couple of beers …. Awwww, it was going down

That is until one day about fifteen years ago I started to put on a little bit of weight

It hit my thighs, then my butt, my gut and my face

At first it was cool because back then I was a bean pole

Six foot four about a buck eighty is what I weighed…. Super Sexy from head to toe

Hey ladies, I am just saying….

Anyway, the weight kept coming pound after pound

After a while I went from super sexy to just plain old round!

After a few more years I guess it could be said

I had officially gone from a six-pack to a keg

Now, I know kegs are fun at parties and whatnot

But they ain’t real cool when you have trouble even putting on socks

See my feet back then …. Child, please

Every day that went by my belly got closer to my knees

Anyway, later in life I took a new job

At a place I used to make fun of

Because everyone there I thought of as food snobs

But this place, WFM, is like no other

They actually cared about my well being instead of just my production

WFM wanted to see me be the best me I could be

So they put me on a plane and flew me out by the sea

Coming from Colorado, where right now it’s cold

I thought, hmmm …. What the hell…. I’ll go hang out with Dr. Stoll

It’s a week of fun in the sun; I can work on my tan

Hit the beach, listen to a of couple lectures; I’ll be cool like a fan

Right out the gate, Dr. Sean makes me cry

Then Dr. Stoll and Dr. Klaper tell me how the food I am eating is going to make me die

Now I am thinking, Florida, hmmm … not so cool

Don’t even get me started on all the salad and all the poop

I came here thinking that this was fat camp

But knowledge is power, so now I am leaving here a champ

Listen, if you guys don’t remember anything I just said, please retain this one fact

After I leave here I am putting in the work

And the next time y’all see me I will have gone from a keg to a six-pack!

The crowd hung on every word of my poem as I read it. They laughed out loud as I talked about what immersion had been like for me so far. When I spoke about my plans and dreams for the future, I felt the crowd acknowledge my readiness to shed my “Big Sexy” persona.

I finished reading and the room burst into applause. People screamed and yelled as they all stood on their feet and clapped. Now it was up to the judges.

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